I'd like to introduce myself. My name is Elizabeth Donald. I'm an author with about five or six books in print. I'm a reporter for a mid-size daily newspaper. I'm a writer active on social networks with thousands of readers. I'm a business owner with an active online presence and web store.
And I'm one of your customers.
I currently manage and/or design six web sites, including the web store for my business and not including the three blogs I write. In addition to using your service for registering my domains, I also use it for web hosting on all six sites, plus the webstore feature, email hosting, SSL certificates and your express email marketing so I can be one of those annoying spammers.
I can't even publicly admit how much money I paid you last year.
But I must admit, you give me terrific service. My web sites are reliable and do not crash. There are no annoying pop-up ads and while I am not the brightest bulb in the programming drawer, I can navigate through your procedures with only a minimum of pain and anguish. You make the interwebs easily accessible for people who aren't programmers or experts, and you do it for a fair price.
Wouldn't it be nice if THAT was the selling point in your commercials?
See, we're coming up to that holiest of Sundays, the Super Bowl. And as usual, I shall be watching with some of my dear friends, and we will pay only the most cursory attention to the football game (who's playing again?) because the real attraction is the commercial lineup.
Last year was one of the worst displays of utterly grotesque misogyny I have ever seen - I can't recall which site called it "Pathetic Men and the Women Who Ruined Them." At least you weren't alone in your annoyingly sexist commercials - Budweiser, the car companies, the stock-purchase people, they were all grotesque last year - more than usual.
At the time, I wrote that it was not only offensive to be so sexist in Super Bowl ads, it was actually bad business - at least 50 percent of the Super Bowl's audience is comprised of women. And unlike me, many of them were watching the game, too.
I can't imagine what a nightmare it would be to move all six of my sites to another service. But each time I see your ridiculous ads with some well-endowed chippie flirting with another girl and a teaser to get us to run to your site and watch juvenile double entendres batted about, I am embarrassed to be one of your customers. From your ads, we can't even tell what you do. Based solely on your commercials, we have to conclude that you are a softcore porn site, and a bad one at that.
Women run web sites.
Women run businesses.
Women make their business decisions based on something other than their pants.
Women watch the Super Bowl.
Wouldn't it be nice if you noticed?
P.S. This goes for the rest of you, too.