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November 2014

The Force Takes a Nap

So the Force is awakening... and we have a new teaser.

I'm not entirely sure how the Force would be asleep in the first place, since it is after all an energy field created by living things. With or without midichlorians, I can't think why it would be inactive unless everyone were dead (i.e. in Coruscant, a biologically-unlikely planet, but why let physics get in the way at this point...) The Force was around when the Empire was running things, it just bops along being all Force-y no matter who's in charge, Dark or Light.

So the Force awakens, and our first image is of a black actor in a Stormtrooper costume. Maybe he was playing Stormtrooper a la Luke in Ep 4, Han in Ep 6. Or maybe the Bad Guys finally figured out that Jango Fett was a terrible shot and replaced their choice of clone material. All I know is that the two character shots - Black Stormtrooper and Unknown Woman on Speeder - told us absolutely zip about the plot. 

Crossguard on a lightsaber? Hmm. Is it just there to be cool-looking, or does it have a purpose? Because I gotta say, my first thought was, "Neat!" My second was, "But... why?" I did not have these thoughts when I saw Darth Maul light up the double-bladed lightsaber, mind you.

And that's kinda my problem, folks. I went back to see the Episode I teaser trailer that made us all so insane that people bought tickets to see The Siege just so they could see the trailer. It had lots of haunting images and interesting new visuals, but it also introduced characters and the semblence of a plot. Story is what gets me to a movie, not just pretty pictures. Watch it and see what I mean, and pretend you don't yet know that Jar Jar is evil.

 

 

That's always been my concern with the choice of J.J. Abrams to take over. After seeing the wreckage he wrought in Star Trek, I worried that he would do the same to Star Wars. Yes, it was awesome to see the Millennium Falcon rise again, but with shakycam? Are we to replace lens flares with shakycam? Oh please no... Wars has always been more action than plot vs. Trek, and Abrams himself has insisted many times that he was more of a Wars fan and didn't really like Trek because, in his words, it was "too smart." 

Who knows, maybe this time Abrams will blow up the Millennium Falcon. What, that's sacred? So was Vulcan, so yeah, I don't think anything is sacred. Though seeing the Falcon again was sooooo nice...

No one would accuse The Phantom Menace of being too smart. Watching the teaser for that one reminds me of how excited we all were to return to the Alliance after decades of devouring books and toys. It also reminds me of the things that disappointed us - damn ye, Jar Jar!

It worries me that I was more excited about Star Wars after seeing the teaser for Episode I than I am after seeing the teaser for Episode VII. It worries me that our first image is finally putting an African-American male in the spotlight for this series... and he's in a Stormtrooper uniform. It worries me that we got absolutely zero plot. It worries me that the fanmade trailer that tricked us all a few days ago was better and more exciting. (And does anyone know what the hell is happening here?)

And it worries me that the Force has somehow been asleep. Get some No-Doz, stat! In the meantime, here it is (for real this time), and here's hoping.